When I first moved to New York City, I knew nobody. Now, through networking, I have more than 1,500 contacts. These contacts generate most of my business, without extensive advertising, costly promotions or having to go through formal interviews. 

For those of us who are independent training professionals, often the only thing that separates us from the competition is how well we have mastered the art of meeting and connecting with new people. After 15 years of research, practice and feedback from the field, I've discovered the seven rules of networking, the five types of people to network with and seven sure-fire tactics to that lead to a successful networking game plan.

The Seven Rules Of Networking

3. Listen
One of the greatest compliments you can give people you speak with is to let them know you're listening to everything they say. Let them tell you their stories. You'll probably learn something new from them.

4. Be aware of your body language
First impressions are lasting ones. Monitor your posture and physical movement before meeting someone for the first time. In most cases, you need to loosen up because meeting new people can be a tense experience. Find ways to relax and reduce stress before networking.

5. Avoid being pushy
Be careful of coming on too strong or needy. People's instincts tell them when someone is "too hungry," and alarms go off because we all want to be associated with winners, not losers.

6. Give genuine compliments
When you listen carefully to people, often they will mention an achievement they are proud of. Think for a moment and find a way to acknowledge this.

7. Use business cards wisely
Business cards are more than names. Ask for people's cards and treat them as fine treasures. You might even make a note on these cards to help you remember something distinctive about these people's cards, giving you direction when you follow up.

On the other hand, when giving away your card, give it only when the other person asks for it. In addition to your card, you might want to give the other person a promotional item. Find something creative but related to your business to offer with your card.

The Five Types Of People To Network With

1. Satisfied customers
These people will be your best referrals. Customers can become advocates because they already know your work. Ask customers to introduce you to others. Most importantly, remember to follow up with your customers with both personal notes and calls. Remember to thank each person who gives you a referral.

Also note that each person in a session could turn out to be a valuable contact. Although you're usually hired by one person in a particular department, the people sitting through your session are the ones getting to know your work.

2. Friends
At some point, friends talk frankly about their work life. Make a sincere effort to learn more about your friends' work and be open to helping them. Then, when the time is right, ask them who they might be able to refer to you. Of course, offer them the same help.

3. Neighbors
Make the effort to strike up conversations with people you live near. Often, you'll find out that you have common interests that you never would have discovered otherwise.

4. People with similar interests
There are also many associations to join. While industry-related organizations are great, there might also be a civic group or Chamber of Commerce meeting that can be even more fruitful. While people in the same industry to refer one another from time to time, there may be greater opportunities to pitch your services at a meeting with a broad range of businesses represented.

5. Happy, helpful people
These are new people you connect with in unexpected ways. You might meet people on a plane or train, or waiting in line at the movies. Life has a funny way of connecting us when we least expect it. We just have to be ready for the opportunity.

The Seven Parts Of Successful Networking

1. Observe and respond to success around you
This means reading the newspaper with a networking eye and listening to the news with a networking ear. When someone in the news gets your attention, send that person a note with a compliment about what he or she said and mention how you were inspired. Then mention that you would enjoy meeting the person and sharing an idea that would interest the person.

2. Set small goals that lead to big goals
Make networking fit into your work plan and set some goals. Let's say you're off to a meeting or business function. Set a goal to make two new contacts. Make sure you leave the room only after that goal is accomplished. Then follow up with these people. One of the best ways to follow up is with a short handwritten note.

3. Offer a thousand thanks
Thank-you notes stand out because they show people that you took the time to craft a personal message. These notes should be short and might include appreciation for something specific that the person said or did, a brief review of anything that will trigger the place you both met, an attention-getting comment or a specific offer given within a specific time.

If you take away only one idea from this article, this note concept should be at the top of your list. Most people won't take the time to write follow-up personal notes. When you do, you'll be unique and remembered.

When I speak to a group, clients often ask me to speak about my "power of three" note plan. Every day, I write three handwritten notes: one to a prospect, one to a client and one to a friend, either professional or personal. At the end of the week, spending about 12 minutes a day, I've made 15 contacts, and at the end of the year, more than 750.

4. Do your homework and be prepared
If you're going to a business luncheon, do advance research related to the industry represented. People appreciate your efforts in getting to know them and their profession. If you know, for example, that mostly meeting planners will be there, find out what the hot topics are for this group.

5. Always support and empower others
Networking skills come naturally to me now; however, it wasn't always that way. We all need to reach out to people, give advice and help anyone who asks. Helping others is a great way to connect, and I often learn the most from those I've extended a hand to. Even in networking, it's much better to give than to receive.

6. Build solid foundations
Once you've determined the best way to network with a new contact, stick with it. For example, if there are monthly meetings for a particular association you belong to, make sure you attend each one.

7. Perception is reality
Always make a good first impression and keep your subsequent impressions good. Whatever you did to make a good first impression (e.g., sending a note, following up quickly, having a cheerful attitude), make sure these positive attributes are always present.

To sum it up, develop and nurture your network with your own system. Think back to current clients you got through networking. Now remember the tactics that led you to those customers and contacts. The goal here is to discover what you already do that works and repeat it. If all this sounds like a lot, start with one or two tips and work with them long enough to measure their effectiveness.

As I first mentioned, I'm no stranger to the business community in New York. It certainly isn't because I'm the most famous training professional in the United States; it's because I made a decision to create a network of business relationships that are uniquely mine. We all can do this by being thoughtful when we meet new contacts. A thoughtful person is a remembered person, and that should be our ultimate networking and self-marketing goal.
 

Andrea Nierenberg is the president of The Nierenberg Group, which specializes in sales training workshops and motivational keynote addresses. Among her offerings is the popular "Creating Chemistry with Your Customers" program. You can contact Andrea via email at  andrean@interport.net or visit her website selfmarketing.com 

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